Saturday, May 31, 2008

Training Time!

Well folks, I'll be away for a little while. I'm headed to Ft. Hunter Liggett to provide my very limited knowledge to Pacific Warrior 2008. Should be fun. Don't know what sort of internet access I'll have while I'm out there so I may not post again until the end of June. If it is that long, hope y'all can managed without me.

Oh and congratulations to SSG George and his family. He out-processed and managed to survive his time in recruiting as well. Enjoy Hawaii.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Dipping a Toe into Punditry

So, recently Senator Obama mentioned that his uncle was involved in the liberation of Auschwitz during WWII. He also mentioned that, upon returning from war, his uncle then spent the next six months sequestering himself in the attic. Turns out it was his great uncle, not his uncle (totally understandable, I refer to my grandmother's brother as "uncle") and that it was Buchenwald not Auschwitz (Auschwitz was liberated by the Soviets). Honestly, these aren't really that big of a deal, to me at least. Calling a male, non-parent, older relative as "uncle", when he's not really your parents' brother, strikes me as rather normal. And confusing which Nazi concentration camp your relative liberated seems like a rather honest mistake. What caught my attention was his referring to his uncle's response when he returned from WWII.

Back when the revelation that Senator Obama and Vice President Cheney were related the senator said:
"The name Dick Cheney, my cousin, will not appear on the ballot," Obama said. "We had been trying to hide that cousin thing for a long time. Everybody's got a black sheep in the family. A crazy uncle in the attic."
When the senator originally made that remark I just figured he was speaking metaphorically. Nope. Turns out he really did have an uncle who spent six months in the attic after returning from war.

Maybe I'm being over-analytical, but is Senator Obama saying that his family considers the man who served in World War II was present at the liberation of a Nazi concentration camp a "black sheep" and "crazy"?

Thursday, May 29, 2008


This story combines my two greatest fears.


Injuries to Mr. Happy.

I'm going to go sob silently in the corner.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Answers, or lack thereof

Well, I've written Mr. Boucai a couple of times seeking a follow-up on the whole "enlisting felons" thing he did a couple years back which was then reported on by the AP. BLUF: The original data represented a combination of approved waivers and suitability reviews, however the academic paper didn't make the distinction and drew conclusions based on data which was factually incorrect. Compounding this, a think tank which supports abolishing Don't Ask, Don't Tell used the cover of this inaccurate paper to issue a call for allowing openly gay people to serve in the military. And this whole shebang was reported in many major outlets due to the reporting of the Associated Press.

However, it seems no one bothered to ask the researcher what his numbers represented until I came along, a year later, and asked.

So, I'm deep into windmill tilting territory right now. There is nothing I can accomplish with this knowledge, and I fully intend to accomplish as much nothing as I can. Since all eight of my readers are either in college or college grads (Hi mom!) if you were to find out that a paper published by a major university was factually incorrect, what would you do?

Good puppy

So, I'm driving home yesterday and I get a text from Mrs. SFC B. "Zoe is vomiting, going to take her to the vet." I know what she's thinking, she's worried about the dog having parvo. For those who don't like to click things, BLUF: parvo is a virus which will seriously dehydrate an animal and can kill them through secondary infections. It's very resiliant and it's a problem here in Arizona. Zoe hasn't had all of her boosters, and even then they're not 100% effective so it's something we need to keep an eye on. If caught early enough the animal has a decent chance of surviving. Although the virus can't be treated, the symptoms (dehydration) can. End result: Mrs. SFC B taking Zoe to the vet.

About a month ago Mrs. SFC B had come into the office where I was hard at work and told me she though Zoe might have parvo and she was going to take her to the vet. Mrs. SFC B's indication that Zoe might have contracted the virus was that she was acting lethargic. I'd never heard of parvo at this point in my life so I quickly practive my Google-fu and check the list of symptoms. Lethargy is right up there, however vomiting and diahrrea are as well. To my knowledge she hadn't demonstrated either. So I go downstairs to check on our lethargic puppy and I'm attacked. Mucho puppy love. Zoe is bouncing, yipping, wagging her tail, basically acting in every non-lethargic way possible. Mrs. SFC B and I agree that, she doesn't have it.

I admit to being worried when I got that text saying she was vomiting. I took Zoe for walks with me in the morning, and while I was vigilant about keepng her away from non-Zoe poop, I was worried I'd exposed her to the virus. I head to the vet to meet w/ Mrs. SFC B and the puppy. I'm quickly led to the room where they are and, as usual, I'm greeted with a very happy puppy showing no signs of distress. At least no signs until she had a swab stuck up her butt and got a couple of shots. She tested negative (yay!) but we were told that she might still have it but hadn't started to shed the virus, so the very nice vet told us to keep an eye on her and watch for several symptoms, most important is lethargy.

Up to this point I'd been told time and time again how Zoe was throwing-up anything she ate or drank as soon as she consumed it. I even saw the towel Mrs. SFC B used to clean it up, and the stain on the patio. At some point that afternoon Zoe had been a very sick dog (that or bulemic). We get home and give Zoe water; no issues. Give her some more; no issues. She is running, jumping, being the exact same hyper ball of fluff she's always been.

Work days I usually wake up around 5, watch SportsCenter, let Zoe into the backyard, and do things like write blog posts and read/ respond to email (I have like 8 billion euros waiting for me from the various lotteries I've won). When I woke up there was Zoe, in her little caged off area running in circles waiting for me to take her out.

While we're not out of the woods yet (if she's symptom free for another 12 hours this will have been, officially, a false alarm) it's looking good. When I left this morning the puppy was doing her little "I'll knife ya! I'm crazy!" schtick with the cat, which is a good thing.

Anyways, time to head off to the office. Have a good one y'all!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Inside Baseball Part 1b

I had intended to write this yesterday, but for some reason I don't know, I was compelled to write something different. Anyways, I'm back on track and I'll go ahead and get started.

I'm pretty sure sometime in the past I'd mentioned that success in recruiting relies on making the best of the gray area between the black and white world of AR 601-210. However I do have over 400 posts spanning nearly three years, so I'm not going to go back looking for some off-hand comment I might have made in a post titled something like "Duhhhhhhhh".

I really do need to work on my post naming skillz.

I also need to work on my habit of beginning paragraphs with "I". I do it too often.


Okay, back on topic.

I learned that lesson after my Station Commander had told me to have people lie on their 2807.

Background. I was a very new recruiter and my first station commander still hadn't given up and began looking for his next assignment, so he actually took an interest in what we were doing as recruiters. One day I was working with a prior service applicant who had agreed to process and enlist. Admittedly I'd done a poor job of pre-qual. I knew he was an RE3 and would require a waiver, but I hadn't probed into the details. I was still wicked new and hadn't learned "how". Anyways, the applicant begins filling out his 2807 and asks me what he should put on it. I tell him to put down what, where, when, and what the result was. And to answer as honestly and completely as he could. After he completed this 2807 I faxed it to MEPS and went home to enjoy the rest of my Sunday (Yes, I was working on a Sunday).

MEPS wouldn't even entertain the concept of this guy enlisting. He was that disqualified. My applicant had been through ASAP and failed. He'd been in and out of alcohol counseling for years and, apparently, been clean for quite a while, but he was done. There was no way he was getting in with that history of problems with alcohol. I found myself at parade rest in the station commander's office being asked if I was trying to make him look bad or if I was just an idiot. It was an unpleasant, one-way conversation.

SSG Rage may remember this, and this was the moment I realized that he really was the best recruiter I was going to meet, but the station commander called the other recruiters in to the office one-by-one to critique the 2807 and tell me how unacceptable it was. After the last recruiter had told me that I shouldn't have even bothered with the guy (they were right), I took a seat and proceeded to have my station commander tell me that no one joins the army without lying.

I objected (GAH!).

When I was 13 years old I spent a good deal of time in the adolescent mental ward at a hospital in Houston. And I spent significantly more time with various counselors and psychiatrists. That's a story for another time. Back in 1995 when I filled out the 2807 (assuming that is what it was called back then, I can't recall) I didn't say I'd been in a hospital. Honestly, to my young self, I didn't consider it a "hospital" and it didn't ring any bells for me. However, on the 2808 it specifically mentioned counseling, psychiatrists, etc and that rung the bell so I listed it. I was DQ'd and told to get the docs related to it. Luckily my mom is a meticlious record keeper and they were submitted quickly. I got the waiver and I was enlisted, even getting a secret clearance in a MI unit. I was honest with my stuff and got in. It was delayed, which undoubtedly ruined my recruiter's day (I saw her twice and never heard from her after I enlisted), but it didn't stop me.

So, within my own military career I had prima facie evidence that not "everyone" lies on their 2807. And, to this day, I don't believe that concealing medical issues or law violations is a good idea. It's a career ender and puts you into harm's way as a recruiter. And yet the person who was going to rate me was telling me to have people lie.

But, reality is what it is.

During my many conversations with other recruiters, the question always boiled down to "Would you go to war with this person?". The only acceptable answer was an unqualified "Yes". Anything else would result in the potential applicant being kindly shown the door. Just not worth people's lives. That's what makes incidents like this so stupid. The guy required a pretty powerful drug to maintain an even keel. There was no way this would turn out good.

If you held a gun to my head and made me tell you the two conditions which I'd blur the line on they would be asthma and ADD/ADHD.

Asthma is a processing killer. If your applicant admits to an asthma-like condition any time since age 12, they're done. It's not happening. The applicant can get as many recommendations and tests they can afford. The moment the docs see "asthma", even it is proceeded by "px has no signs of", they're done. Sure, with the hundreds of people processed some will sneak through and get an asthma waiver, but it won't happen when you need it. Nothing is better than the first time you have an all city/county/state athlete DQ'd for asthma. It just makes you sit at your desk and think about whether Al Qaeda has a sleeper cell at Ft. Knox.

ADD/ADHD is a little more thorny. Supposedly all you need is a doctor's letter stating they have been off the drug for a year. Problem is, they rarely get that letter when they go off the medication. The kid just stops taking it because... whyever. And most doctor's won't just go "Sure SGT Recruiter, I'll write whatever you want on this note and sign it for you." So you find yourself in the position of having to tell Skippy Stoppedritalinatfourteen to come back in a year. Station Commanders do not like next action dates that are 365 days out. Not one bit.

In those situations common sense and the rules I thought out last year may help.

It's late, I'm tired. Have a good one.

It's working!

I went ahead and checked my Statcounter data (I usually have to make sure that my IP isn't being counted. If it was I'd have well over 500,000 hits) and my bid for more traffic has worked. I had no idea how many people thought Blogger was a good way to see boobs. I had no idea I could be found by searching for "tpless cars and girls". Aren't most cars usually tpless? I know we only have tp in the car when we're coming back from a supply run to the commissary. Seriously though, as disappointed I am that a horny mispelling (when you're searching use two hands to type) resulted in more traffic. Not half as disappointed as the dude must have been when he found that my car has a top.

And the girl was a real dog too.

Monday, May 26, 2008

In my spirit of finding new things to read, hopefully things that don't make me think back on every single person I've ever met and regret a whole lot of things, I updated some of my various reading lists with the things I find myself reading when I get the chance. If you're in the mood and don't do so already (I'm such a trailblazer linking to Oliver Willis! [I swear Mr. Willis, I didn't put you last because I'm a racist republican and you're back, it was just the last one I got to because it's on the bottoms of Instapundit's blogroll! Blame him!]), check them out. You might find thing I've plagiarized from them!

I really do want to read what continues to go on in military recruiting, USAREC in particular, but I just can't seem to find any new blogs run by military recruiters. This saddens me.

On second thought....

Oh, and I think this is my first three post day ever. It helps when you get started at 5:too damn early00.

And since this is a day of firsts, I figured I'd post my first link to something my sister had drawn.My sister was isan incredible artist. I never told her that when she was activly drawing because 1) I am in the Army and was stationed far away during the peak of her artistic endevour 2) I'm a jealous prick who is envious of the fact she has an artistic talent which was worthy of mucho praise. My talents are limited to tying cherry stems into knots and pecking keys on a keyboard slightly more accuratly than a chimpanzee. However her high falootin' life as a high speed ad exec in New York City whittles away at the time she had in college to pursue that talent. I do hope she find the time and the muse some day. I need some free artwork for my blog damnit. Of course, as our aunt and uncle show, it's never too late to start that art career.

Anyways, it's late, I'm tired. See y'all later

Inside Baseball

If you are a recruiter you have probably spent more than one night in a bar after getting out of the recruiting station. Lord knows I have. There were some nights when getting into that smoke-filled bar was like grabbing hold of a life preserver. The fact that the preferred watering hole for my recruiting station had cheap beer and was very pro-military only made it better. If you have done your time in recruiting without ever needing a night of just washing the stress away, one bottle at a time, you're a better person than I am and you have my respect.

There is a time and a place for it though. And I knew where it was. And I didn't do anything about it. As ashamed as I am to say it, I even encouraged the crossing of that line. As a result a price is being paid. The list of things that could have, and should have, been done is a long as the list of blatant warning signs that I either ignored, laughed off, or rationalized. If I'd been a better NCO or friend I'd have done something to stop what was inevitable if everyone stood back and watched. But I was not. And for that, if you're reading this, I'm sorry.

I know that "military recruiter blogging" seems to have been something which died out about a year ago. Seeing as how only one of the seven "current" blogs I link to has been updated in 2008. I don't know how many recruiters still drop by here, I do know it is a lot less than before. It doesn't bother me. I do this as much for the occasional clarification of my thoughts as I do for anything else. But if there are any recruiters reading this, dear god people, don't end your careers, marriage, family, or lives while you're in this shitty assignment.

My time in USAREC ended about three months ago. Since then I've lost weight, work out 5-6 times a week, I enjoy going to work and being in the Army. I leave next week for a month at Hunter-Liggett getting to train Soldiers. Not bullshit "training" like they want you to do with Future Soldiers, but honest-to-God, fully tactical enviroment training for men and women who will be going into harm's way sometime in the not-to-distant future. To those recruiters out there who are still stressing about that kid going to MEPS tomorrow. Who are smiling and dialing long past sanity trying to get that third grad made. Who are sweating out that nut in T1:
It will end, and things will get better
When you are finished with the New Recruiter Program, and those next two and a half years seem like they will take forever, and you have no idea how you'll deal with it because you're too shy, or don't talk well on the phone, or can't identify with those kids, one day it will end. You'll be at battalion and the incentives manager will be giving you your final point sheet and you'll be done. It is the sweetest day.

Do not do anything to jeopardize that. You're giving your fitness, your health, bits of your sanity to recruiting. The drain of the 3:30 drives to the outskirts of your territory to pick up a kid to take him to MEPS because the budget folks jacked up and don't have the money for the shuttle will take its toll. Do not let it beat you. And more importantly, do not take the chemical of your choice to make it better. It's not worth it. If you're a leader or a friend of someone who you think is going to do something self-destructivly stupid do something about it. For their sake do something about it. Take them aside and let them know what you're seeing. Direct them to get some help. Worst case scenario drive them to the CLT and tell the first sergeant, CO, or RT what is going on. Do something before someone else does.

On this date

I clicked over the Astrosdaily to read the recap of the painful loss they suffered last night. The first entry on their "On This Day" today summation referred to a day back in 1990 when the Astros took a doubleheader from the Cubs in Chicago thanks to Glenn Davis hitting three home runs and driving in nine during the twin bill. I distinctly remember that day because that Saturday was the first time that my mother, my sister, and I visited by dad's grave site together after he was buried. I remember getting out of the car, our blue Mercury Grand Marquis at the time, after hearing Milo Hamilton describe Davis' first home run of the day. I also remember that we had parked way far away from the grave site because we didn't know there was a road which ran a bit closer. It took us several minutes to find where we were supposed to go. We got better at it thanks to a near-by grave stone looking like a park bench. And, if you don't want people sitting on your grave, don't have a bench as a headstone.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Sunday Morning

Hope everyone is having a wonderful Memorial Day. Last night Mrs. SFC B and I went to the birthday party for one of her coworker's daughter. Had a blast, although I was the second most anglo person there. Mrs. SFC B was the most. And before she wails about how I'm obviously "whiter" than her, I'd like to point out that I am the son of an immigrant while her family had been in the US for a couple generations on her mother's side and at least three on her father's. Take that gringa.

Anyways, a good time was had. I developed a lust for a Wii, I had a six pack of Shiner, and I talked with a guy in the IRR about what he needed to bring for an IRR Muster being held in Mesa next month. This Soldier has a disability rating from the VA and was curious what he needed to bring to the muster (answer: everything related to that).

I got up this morning around 6 and took Zoe out of her plush prison (the master bathroom in a previous life). I fed the cats and the dog and then chilled out with an Astros recap. BLUF: They won again!

About this time Zoe made it quite clear that she wanted to go outside. Since it is BEAUTIFUL I figured I'd grab my camera and see what we could see.

Here is Zoe all excited about getting to go outside. That or she's a hellhound.Zoe very quickly began to tear across creation in her usual self. I tried to get a picture of her facing the camera, but she had no intention of slowing down enough to allow that to happen.

Although she did take time to smell the flowers.

She also had to check her p-mail.
And then she sent some.

Cheap joke, I know. We could have walked some more, but I wasn't exactly wearing hiking shoes... or even shoes... so there was a limit to how far I could meander.
Yes. Those are flip-flops and jeans. No. I wasn't ashamed. Although it wasn't a very long walk, it had the desired effect. The dog peed and she was left too tired to be annoying for a short while.So a good morning has been had by all.

And, if I didn't know better, I'd say this was planned. Two days after I become emotionally involved in someone's autoblography they put up a post mentioning a need for sponsorship to attend a blog conference. While I'm not a Lear jet exec and the advertising proceeds from Detailed Recruiter currently stands a $0.00, and I can't begin to describe how badly I'd get beaten for a "SFC B Rules" tattoo on some other woman's boob, I can point out the "Donate" button and use it myself. Also, there is a link for the Blogher conference where a certain blogger can get their expenses paid. Maybe a ballot-box stuffing campaign will work as just as well as having a tata tattoo'd.

I like alliteration.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Thanks Christina

I was originally introduced to Crystal over at Boobs, Injuries, and Dr. Pepper through a link on Lucrative Pain. How could I possibly resist something which contains "boob"? Since it wasn't something I linked to, I didn't check it frequently (when I link something I link it so that it's easier for me to read it regardless of the computer I'm using), but I'd click on it occasionally and read what was there.

When I clicked there today I found myself spending the next hour and a half completely engrossed.

Anyone who knows me well knows that, when I find something interesting to read, I will not stop until I'm done. I did not stop until I'd finished reading and rereading her Crazy Chronicles series.

It's not reading for the light-hearted. It's actually terrifyingly depressing. I've read a whole lot of things in my life, and that series is, simply, the best. I've had my experiences with the mental health profession and her recent experience brought up some old, somewhat unpleasant, memories. I originally started reading Crystal around 9am this morning and I finished reading it around 10:30. The rest of the day I've had that story in my head. I don't know if I'll ever lose it.

I'm not sure I want to.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

I'm melting! I'm melting!

Well, not quite. Although according to some voice on the radio the heat index was upwards of 115. That reading was what was waiting for me when I hopped in to my car after work yesterday. Although it might have been pure hot outside, it was a comfortable 71 inside. And yes, I set it at 71 specifically because Senator Obama doesn't think I should be allowed to be any cooler than 72. I would have went cooler, thus wasting even more dinosaur juice, however I was wearing shorts and it would have been too chilly. I tried to make up for it though by driving faster. However those fiendishly clever German engineers designed the engine and transmission so that, even at rather rapid speeds, it keeps its MPG over 30. Damn them.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

To much time

So, over the weekend I was reading an entry from Rachel Lucas on her opinions of Firefly. BLUF: she might have gotten knocked up by images of Captain Tightpants. While reading the comments on her post though I saw a link to Allecto who had written a slightly less praising review of the Firefly universe. BLUF: she might have gotten knocked up by images of Captain Tightpants, but only because he is a viscious woman hater who raped her repeatedly.
For myself, I’m not sure that I will recover from the shock of watching the malicious way in which Joss stripped his female characters of their integrity, the pleasure he seemed to take from showing potentially powerful women bashed, the way he gleefully demonized female power and selfhood and smashed women into little bits, male fists in women’s faces, male voices drowning out our words.
Obviously I'm terribly biased because of that whole "being a man thing", but if having to watch a TV show creates everlasting, emotionally scarring in you, maybe the problem is you. I don't even know why I'm wasting my time writing this, but I'm going to damnit.
The first scene opens in a war with Mal and Zoe. Zoe runs around calling Mal ‘sir’ and taking orders off him. I roll my eyes. Not a good start.
I knew I was in for a lot of unintentional comedy when I read this line. The scene to which the writer is referring is the opening scene of the pilot. In this scene Mal and Zoe are members of a rebel military force. Mal out ranks Zoe so Zoe calls him "sir". Techincally, Mal is an enlisted member, but maybe the Independents (not Independence as Allecto misstates) have a Marine-like structure where NCOs are referred to as "sir" by those they outrank. Now I'm sure Ms. Allecto could write 10 paragraphs about how she felt battered because a woman was subordinate to a man within a military, but Zoe isn't calling Mal "sir" in that because Joss Whedon gets off on seeing women call men honorifcs, but because they're in the damned military. Stripping lines of their context will be a repeated feature of Allecto's diatribe.
The next scene is set in the present. Mal, Jayne, and Zoe are floating about in space. They come into some danger. Mal gets all panicky. Zoe says, “This ship's been derelict for months. Why would they –” Mal replies, (in Chinese) “Shut up.” So in the very second scene of the very first episode, an episode written and directed by the great feminist Joss, a white man tells a black woman to ‘shut up’ for no apparent reason.
Um, Allecto, he didn't tell her to "shut-up" for "no apparent reason". In this scene the crew of Serenity was conducting an illegal salvage operation when a large cruiser from the government happened upon the scene unexpectedly. Mal was telling Zoe to "shut-up" because it was possible for the cruiser to detect them based on their communications. Now, "shut-up" is rude, but Allecto strips the scene of any semblance of context in the effort to prove her point that Jooss Whedon is a sexist racist.

How Allecto managed to keep from spontaneously combusting upon the introduction of Inara, the prostitute, is beyond me. Maybe only her hair caught on fire.

Being the sterotypical mysogynist I am, at this point, I was wondering when Allecto was going to cast aspersions real life hetrosexual relationships. In my "Guide to Hating Women" manual, which I got at my quarterly Knuckle-Draggers meeting, it tells me that lesbian feminists like nothing more than to insult nonlesbian relationships. Honestly, I do wish I was joking and that I didn't know that insults about heterosexual relations were imminent. I wish that a hardcore lesbian feminist wouldn't be so transparent and intellectually bankrupt as to need to attack relationships between men and women. Of course, as the old saying goes, if wishes were horses than beggars would ride. It takes Allecto about two paragraphs to go from editoralizing on a television show, to alledging that the producer of the show treats his wife as a prostitute.
Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Joss uses his own wife in this way (SFC B as a prostitute). Expects her to clean up his emotional messes. Expects her to be there, eternally supportive, eternally subservient and grateful to him in all his manly glory. I hope the money is worth it, Mrs. Whedon.
I'm curious if the Whedon's are aware that a blogger has convertly installed a series of cameras into their household so as to observe them and eliminate all doubt as to the nature of their relationship. Unless of course she's just being libelous. Of course, she can't limit herself to making assumptions about the relationship of only one couple.
Let me just say now that I have never personally known of a healthy relationship between a white man and a woman of colour.
I wonder if she ever stops to think about what it is about her that leads her to know only people in abusive relationships. Well, I guess we've established that Allecto doesn't know Carol Mosely Braun, Robert DeNiro, and William Cohen. Of course, the possibility that there is a perception bias since Allecto is, apparently, a very proud, vocal feminist who happens to also be a lesbian can't be ignored. I highly doubt that Allecto's circle of friends would include a large number of healthy heterosexual couples since, frankly, people natually tend to group with people like themselves.

See, I can make half-assed assumptions about people I've never met too!

Seriously though, reading through Allecto's various blogs reveals that a world where radial feminists controlled entertainment would be a truly horrible place. A place where the sweet nothingness of death would be a welcome release. I never actually believed the sterotype that feminists had no sense of humor until I spent a couple hours reading someone who claims to be a feminist. There really is no joy or humor in this woman's writing. Of course since she thinks sex between a man and a woman is always rape, that half of the world are morons, and that the half that are morons run the world, I can understand why she's be joyless and humorless.

By-the-by, can someone please explain to me what "patriarchal medicine" is?

Friday, May 09, 2008

Hot Topless Girl on Car

Yes. The title is a blatant attempt at generating more traffic.


But, let it not be said I don't deliver.

The SFC B Family recently got a new vehicle, and to commemorate the occasion I figured I'd have a girl take off her top and sit on the car. Because nothing says "class" like scantily clad girls and automobiles.

Since it is a European vehicle I specifically used a European girl for the shoot.

Anyways... this is Zoe. She's from Pomerania.Zoe likes licking things and being held. She is also not shy about public displays of affection. She's my kinda girl! In that picture she's discovering the intense fun of sliding down a freshly waxed hood.Here is Zoe looking off into the distance... or at a bug. She likes bugs too. Anyways... this shoudl replace "Fergie's butt" and "ejaculando" as the most search for terms that get me hits.

Yay for traffic!